a goodbye to say

rest in peace poppy crick ♥

today was a very sad day. my beautiful sixteen year old black labrador, poppy died this morning in her sleep. she has been suffering with skin cancer for the past two years and decided today she couldn't cope any longer.

she was such a beautiful dog and was like another sister to me. we bought her when i was five, so effectively, we have grown up together. i will always remember the first day she arrived home. my brother, sister and i were told to wait in the lounge whilst mum fetched her from the dining room. within two seconds, we had a tiny labrador puppy, pink belly and all, bounding towards us. she was so energetic and hyper, she pushed me over from my crouching position and began licking my face. i remember being in complete stitches of laughter.

poppy was the most beautiful gift of life and i will always, always remember her. it is such a horrible day for my family and i, and also our friends and family who loved her so much too.

she really did bring joy and fun to everyone with all her little quirks.

i will miss you pops, you're in my heart always.

♥ xxxxxxxx

felt the familiar

i've always been fascinated by the after life; ghosts and ghouls... heaven and hell. after my grandmother died three years ago, i became more and more convinced it really existed.

it all started about a month or two after she passed. i was at work, having a tough day, when i suddenly felt a hand on my back. i automatically turned round to see who it was, but no one was there, yet i still felt the pressure on my back. it was positioned as if someone was standing next to me with their right arm held around me, resting just below my right shoulder blade. i instantly knew who it was, and i felt so deeply comforted. i felt the same thing probably about twice a week, and usually whenever i was feeling upset about something. its like she was telling me she was still there for me, not in body; but in spirit. i smiled every time and said a quiet hello.

today was different. today i could smell her. her familiar musky perfume filled, that i always loved, brought me comfort and contentment. i have been struggling badly with severe depression and have recently been diagnosed with just that. its almost like she realises how much i need her, so she's trying everything within her power to let me know she's there. so call me crazy, call me what you will, but i do believe she's watching over me very carefully and she will always be proud of me and my siblings. she may not be a ghouly "scooby doo white-sheet" ghost but she's a spirit; a lovely, beautiful, caring spirit. i will always love her and thank her for being the greatest grandmother i could have asked for.

i love you grannie

xxxxxxxxxxxxx